I’m like Middle-Age Hot.

I’ve recently had this sort of epiphany about the way people look. Basically, I’ve realized that as a person progressively gets older they become more and more attractive for their age group regardless of if they were attractive when they were younger.

Okay let me explain: If you’re in high school and you look like I did in high school (aka giant hips, big butt, slightly overweight, small boobs) you probably hate your life. Because high school is filled with teeny, tiny little girls who have barely gotten their adult bodies, and short, tween looking boys who are not even close to fully developed (mentally and physically); so when you have the body of a housewife with two-children, you don’t at all feel like you belong.

But then this glorious thing happens; you go to college and everyone starts getting a little extra chunky and the boys finally get taller and expectations get a little bit lower, and suddenly you’re hot! Well like not that hot, but like….more attractive than you were in high school. But the struggle isn’t over yet for girls like me because college is still home to the ~genetically gifted~ that will make you feel not-so worthy.

But still, you’re improving, you’re becoming the kind of hot associated with the *shrugs* “Yeah she’s pretty hot, I could be into it” but not the “Oh my god she’s so hot, she’s my dream girl, I would never be good enough for her”. That my friends, is the definition of middle-age hot.

It wasn’t until the past year or so that I realized that I was middle-age hot. Middle-age hot is like if you look at your body right now, and imagine how attractive you’d be if you had that same body at the age of 37. Hell yeah!! You’re hot af! Because as we get older people get bigger and softer and wrinklier and other people who are 37 start not minding all that extra chunk because they’ve got their own extra chunk to deal with. So suddenly the expectation of being hot is lowered significantly in each stage of life to the point where people who were never hot are suddenly super hot!

So if us middle-age hot people can maintain our bodies until we’re actually middle-aged then for the first time in our whole lives we’ll just be normal hot.

It’s not just girls who deal with this phenomenon. I’ve noticed for myself that as I’ve reached the ripe old age of 21 (lol) my expectations on what’s attractive and what isn’t have changed significantly. Like don’t get me wrong, send a boy with a body like Zac Efron my way and I surely will not be disappointed, but send me a guy who looks like 30 year old slightly balding man, who wears khaki’s, hasn’t worked out in a year, and appears to be financially stable and lord bless I’ll probably wanna marry you!!

So yeah, being middle-age hot at 21 years old may not sound like the greatest thing in the world. But hey, as the years go by the people like me will just keep getting hotter while all the normal hot people have already peaked 😉

In the meantime, I may just need to start dating 30 year old divorcees.

From me for you,



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